A Work in Progress  (for Walt)

I remember America... 
when I went to the edge of the road and looked down
a long long way to the end where the road turned and you could see the dust rise up
as a truck came towards our house...

And I remember my great grandfather sitting in his garden on his aluminum lawn chair
with his shorts and his undershirt on a 90 degree day
and the fan in the bedroom where I slept with the window open listening to the sound of the cicadas until I thought my ears should just abandon me and fly away to a silent place...
we didn't have an air conditioner in 1972....
 I remember the general store and the hard butterscotch candy sticks and the dark molasses paddles
better than chocolate, nothing compares...
That store is still there and so are the paddles
cuz candy doesn't go out of style and it reminds us that we are all children.

but where is everything else?

like,  effort...
we raked our leaves without a noisy blower in our brains killing the sound of the day...
and swept the floor - with a - broom
and had a work bench and used it to do - work.
no one called a handy man cuz we were the handy men.

What happened to America?
we are buying ourselves to death and I am so disgusted 
with the money lenders and the money changers I want to tip the tables...
this land was my temple, you fuckers 
who the hell did you sell my America to?
not me.
I see the places where we used to live and where you used to live and there's nobody left
the towns are replaced by paper condos and paper mansions that have no soul
shoddy paper garbage poorly made save a bundle cheat a bunch of dimwits poop

I hate this America
this ugly
futile America
that you left us... to rot in.
we worked and breathed 
the foul air 
for you
and then you shipped it out to somewhere else to 
kill some other poor suckers and give them 98 % less pay because you didn't want to fix the problems and do the right thing you just fired 10s of thousands of real live people and moved your filthy mines and factories to places where you can still pollute and pay people shit wages with no health care and abuse them SHAME ON YOU shame on you... I hate corporate decisions I hate the ugly fat cat America smoking its cigar in the face of a pregnant Filipino I hate that America

gone are the days of  the extended family and hard work and succeeding and pride and ethic
now we're left with a colossal kardashian lack of self worth  
whining about our Epic Uselessness
I want it to dry up
explode disappear 
talentless bachelor millionaire survivor dancer big hair toddler princesses
and their fat hideous exploiter parents
I hate that hideous America 

I hate hate hate this petty delusional fat ugly videophile America

I want to rake my leaves and walk to the market down the street ( I want to get my muscles from real life not hot pilates-yoga twice a week, no, 3 times, no... um,  actually, I think I am addicted to it... I think I might have an addiction to my trainer.. my shopping ..my kindle.. my facebook.. my second life, my ? ..second life? ugh what the fuck is wrong with a culture that has to give itself a multiple clinical diagnosis as an excuse for being selfish hoarding wasters?)

I want to walk to the market down the street
instead of driving 15 miles to the costco for a deal on 25 lbs of beef and a ketchup bottle bigger than my head.

I want to live in the land of pride in craftsmanship
love of the land and the people
not the wealth and the decadence 
I want my America to shine from its generosity and good sense
not reek with the stench of dead rats and  5 year old garbage emanating from the suburban hoarders houses
1 in 25 people ?!
what?! really?
4% of the population
stinks with the reek of stuff - made in some sweat shop some where...
stuff stuffing up their houses, their bedrooms, their thoughts, their will to live, their loves, their families 
stuff stuff
can I say it enuff?!!!? 
I hate the new America. I hate the new fat destitute PTSD porn star barbie doll soldier America

I don't want to go back ... however romantic 
I want to go forward
I want to make new, real, natural, let me make that very clear, NATURAL,  good, healthy products in our country made by Americans  to be sustainable and free and clean and loving to the world 
I want a new America that isn't addicted to Ease and lethargy and apathy and sloth and greed
I want to be a new America that loves health and joy and fairness 
and sees to it that their friends and neighbors learn from their shining example of altruism and truth and honesty.

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